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My girlfriend and I went to a Renaissance Fair, and she talked me into wearing a kilt. While we were browsing a shop, some old woman asked what I was wearing underneath it. Without missing a beat, my girlfriend replied “My lipstick.” The old woman turned bright red.
I was at a friend's house the other day, and he comes rushing up to his room stating "Justin Bieber got charged with assault!" I feel bad for the kid who has to go home and tell his Dad he got beat up by Justin Bieber.
According to one of my friends,
I went to the swimming pool last night ... After the pool, I checked my mobile in the locker room and I had 4 missed calls and 6 text messages from my GF:
SMS1: Honey, why don't you answer my calls???
SMS2: It seems you're busy even for texting!!!
Girl : Hi honey :-*
Boy : Hi my love [Sending failed]
Girl : Honeeeeey ?
Boy : What happend ? I'm here [Sending failed]
Girl : Are you ignoring me ?
Boy : No honey , I'm answering you . [Sending failed]
Girl : Relationship's Over , Bye!!!
Boy : Fuck You , Go to hell !!! [Message Sent]