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My GF: Stop treating me like a child.
Her Dad: You sprouting any hairs down there yet?

#99
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She's A Keeper! (14) - Dump Her Ass! (2)

Jan 30, 2011 05:36 AM - School - by Marlen (man)

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I saw this online and thought of you!

#91
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She's A Keeper! (36) - Dump Her Ass! (2)

Jan 30, 2011 03:45 AM - Sports - by Mark (man)

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You Will Love Me! Roses Are Red, Bullets Are Lead. Take Me Back Now, Or Get Shot In The Head! LMAOO

#107
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She's A Keeper! (21) - Dump Her Ass! (13)

Feb 18, 2011 09:05 AM - Breakups - by Allen Analian (man)

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Me: Check out the new Yelawolf video
GF: Whuuuut? I didnt know he was white?
Me: Whatchu mean you didnt know he was white?!
GF: I thought he was Yellow

#282
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She's A Keeper! (4) - Dump Her Ass! (14)

Mar 26, 2012 05:51 AM - Misc - by iamknoware (man)

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My little brother (10) was acting very crazy one day and my mother asked him if they needed to put him on medication. With a perfectly straight face, he replied, "There’s no medication for being awesome."

#211
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She's A Keeper! (31) - Dump Her Ass! (4)

Aug 10, 2011 08:43 AM - Kids - by Awesomeness12 (man)

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On her seeming lack of enthusiasm while she prepared coffee in the nude: "You get enthusiasm, or you get boobs. You don't get both."

#225
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She's A Keeper! (57) - Dump Her Ass! (9)

Sep 22, 2011 11:54 PM - Misc - by Sam (man)

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Texting :

Girl : Hi honey :-*
Boy : Hi my love [Sending failed]

Girl : Honeeeeey ?
Boy : What happend ? I'm here [Sending failed]

Girl : Are you ignoring me ?
Boy : No honey , I'm answering you . [Sending failed]

Girl : Relationship's Over , Bye!!!
Boy : Fuck You , Go to hell !!! [Message Sent]

#229
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She's A Keeper! (14) - Dump Her Ass! (51)

Oct 13, 2011 02:16 PM - Breakups - by MR. Garcia (man)

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Saying 'I love you' only during sex does not count - yes it does!

#70
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She's A Keeper! (24) - Dump Her Ass! (9)

Jan 30, 2011 02:36 AM - Love - by Cain (man)

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Part 03 (Last):
SMS5: It's all my fault , I thought you were human but I was wrong!!! You piece of shit and your fat f**king mother. Go to hell with your ... cousin (girl)!!!
SMS6: Ow I forgot to say, Me and your friend "Saeed" have had a relationship for 2 months...Bye F**KER!!!

#215
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She's A Keeper! (4) - Dump Her Ass! (55)

Sep 10, 2011 04:56 PM - Love - by Mr. Garcia (man)

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Sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. Ever. I don't care how drunk you are."

#77
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She's A Keeper! (25) - Dump Her Ass! (1)

Jan 30, 2011 02:59 AM - Drunk - by Chris (man)

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"He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well."

#87
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She's A Keeper! (27) - Dump Her Ass! (5)

Jan 30, 2011 03:17 AM - Drunk - by Rodrigo (man)

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They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.

#83
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She's A Keeper! (9) - Dump Her Ass! (2)

Jan 30, 2011 02:59 AM - Work - by Adam (man)

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My GF: Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
Me: I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.

#85
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She's A Keeper! (18) - Dump Her Ass! (3)

Jan 30, 2011 03:17 AM - Drunk - by Jeff (man)

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I saw two teenagers stopped at a green light at a major road, honking at and flipping off an old man crossing slowly. As a result, the old man dropped his pants and mooned the youngsters. Classic!

#209
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She's A Keeper! (23) - Dump Her Ass! (1)

Aug 10, 2011 08:43 AM - Sex - by Moonies (man)

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"You are always looking for the green grass over the rainbow"

#346
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She's A Keeper! (8) - Dump Her Ass! (3)

Dec 12, 2012 02:02 AM - Misc - by pie (man)

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My girlfriend and I went to a Renaissance Fair, and she talked me into wearing a kilt. While we were browsing a shop, some old woman asked what I was wearing underneath it. Without missing a beat, my girlfriend replied “My lipstick.” The old woman turned bright red.

#213
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She's A Keeper! (111) - Dump Her Ass! (2)

Aug 10, 2011 08:43 AM - Sex - by lmao234 (man)

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Found our roommate masturbating to Justin Bieber. I mean, really?

#94
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She's A Keeper! (18) - Dump Her Ass! (15)

Jan 30, 2011 05:12 AM - Sex - by James (man)

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On why she was not going to wear a bra that day: “Because my boobs are awesome and they must be free to point at the sky!”

#224
1 Comments

She's A Keeper! (68) - Dump Her Ass! (9)

Sep 22, 2011 11:54 PM - Drunk - by Carl (man)

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"I can't fall in love with someone until I know they're good at boning. It's a relationship, not an apprenticeship."

#223
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She's A Keeper! (52) - Dump Her Ass! (15)

Sep 22, 2011 11:54 PM - Love - by Mike (man)

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"Don't you think this would be the perfect store for you to work at? It's what you do naturally."

#100
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She's A Keeper! (25) - Dump Her Ass! (4)

Jan 30, 2011 05:50 AM - Money - by Hank (man)

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