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My girlfriend said: I like the way the dogs feet smell......weather he pees on them or not. Just something about the way dog feet smell.......I like it :)

#19
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She's A Keeper! (7) - Dump Her Ass! (46)

Jan 2, 2011 11:37 PM - Misc - by jmlcolorado (man)

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Took her to the movies, and came back to my car to find out my battery had died.. got it jumped and came back to her place, and as i lean in for a kiss, she backs away and says "pssh im not kissing you, your car broke down" and walks into her house. Damn.

#66
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Jan 29, 2011 09:36 PM - Breakups - by Carlos (man)

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We were driving home from a weekend trip and my girl sucked me off and I came in her mouth (she never takes it in her mouth). So we are at my house the day after and I cum on her tits but got a little near her mouth. She said "just cause I spoil you one time you think you can just do what you want"

#106
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Feb 15, 2011 10:42 PM - Sex - by g6landed (man)

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She sends me this picture and says: "Treat me right, or else..."

#92
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Jan 29, 2011 10:45 PM - Love - by Brandon (man)

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After having sex, I finished in her mouth, and she looks up at me, a big smile comes across her face and she excitedly says "It tastes like Devon" .

#228
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Sep 25, 2011 10:15 PM - Sex - by devon-guy (man)

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Part 03 (Last):
SMS5: It's all my fault , I thought you were human but I was wrong!!! You piece of shit and your fat f**king mother. Go to hell with your ... cousin (girl)!!!
SMS6: Ow I forgot to say, Me and your friend "Saeed" have had a relationship for 2 months...Bye F**KER!!!

#215
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Sep 10, 2011 12:56 PM - Love - by Mr. Garcia (man)

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After talking to her ex-bf: "Great, now I have hepatitis, gross.

#63
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Jan 29, 2011 09:30 PM - Sex - by Mike (man)

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"I think of you as a brother...WTF?"

#72
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Jan 29, 2011 09:37 PM - Love - by Brian (man)

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On how she was going to convince her boss to give her a raise: "Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth."

#65
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Jan 29, 2011 09:30 PM - Work - by Sean (man)

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I just drunk dialed your mom! SHIT!

#1
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Dec 11, 2010 04:57 PM - Drunk - by prodjallen (man)

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I know this is gonna sound weird, but my boobs tell me to break up with you - then get implants and shut them the fuck up!

#74
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Jan 29, 2011 09:37 PM - Sex - by Jamie (man)

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Part 02:
SMS3: You have to call right now or you will pay for it!!!
SMS4: Son of a B**ch, where the hell are you???

#216
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Sep 10, 2011 12:57 PM - Love - by MR. Garcia (man)

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Part 1:
According to one of my friends,
I went to the swimming pool last night ... After the pool, I checked my mobile in the locker room and I had 4 missed calls and 6 text messages from my GF:
SMS1: Honey, why don't you answer my calls???
SMS2: It seems you're busy even for texting!!!
.
.
.

#217
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She's A Keeper! (2) - Dump Her Ass! (17)

Sep 10, 2011 12:58 PM - Love - by MR. Garcia (man)

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My bed would like to meet you...no, not you...the other guy who isn't a douchebag of a boyfriend.

#69
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Jan 29, 2011 09:36 PM - Love - by Austin (man)

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Women mature much faster than men. Most 17-year-old females can function as adults. Most 17-year-old males are still trading baseball cards and giving each other wedgies after gym class. This is my way of breaking up with you.

#71
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Jan 29, 2011 09:36 PM - Kids - by Danny (man)

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My girlfriend and I were having sex, she was on top and I came in her. She tells me "Hold on, I want you to know how this feels", she lifts off and creampies all over my stomach.

#73
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She's A Keeper! (20) - Dump Her Ass! (16)

Jan 29, 2011 09:37 PM - Love - by Isaac (man)

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Texting :

Girl : Hi honey :-*
Boy : Hi my love [Sending failed]

Girl : Honeeeeey ?
Boy : What happend ? I'm here [Sending failed]

Girl : Are you ignoring me ?
Boy : No honey , I'm answering you . [Sending failed]

Girl : Relationship's Over , Bye!!!
Boy : Fuck You , Go to hell !!! [Message Sent]

#229
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She's A Keeper! (9) - Dump Her Ass! (15)

Feb 5, 5365 01:18 PM - Breakups - by MR. Garcia (man)

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There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says "I suck bad dick". What do you think?

#78
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Jan 29, 2011 09:59 PM - Sex - by Kanye (man)

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“I don’t even understand how you can dance to dubstep”

#219
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Sep 22, 2011 07:48 PM - Misc - by Steve (man)

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There is a cigarette burn in the front of my thong...I'm scared to know what happened last night.

#84
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She's A Keeper! (5) - Dump Her Ass! (9)

Jan 29, 2011 10:17 PM - Drunk - by Brady (man)

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